Thursday Stories

Today’s brave story is from a dear friend of mine, Emily Roosa, who always has a smile and a hug ready and waiting for me every time I see her. She’s a beautiful woman of God who’s glass is not half full or half empty but rather overflowing because she is constantly seeking the Father who pours into her daily. I hope you are encouraged by her brave story!

Stories from San Antonio
In July of 2010, I tripped on some uneven ground and hurt my foot. I knew that I either broke it or sprained it. I went to the doctor’s office and they told me it was sprained and informed me not to swing dance for a week. My all time favorite passion was swing dancing! I used to dance for hours many nights a week. I was so upset when I was told I could not dance for a week! Little did I know the adventure that God had planned for me! I soon discovered that I was misdiagnosed. Another doctor told me I had a stress fracture in my foot. So I wore a boot for several months. Then I discovered I was misdiagnosed again, and another doctor informed me that I had several fractures and a mid foot torn ligament. So I was in an orthopedic shoe, a boot or walking cast for about 6 months total. It took me a full year to get my foot back to “normal.” I was finally allowed to swing dance again!

I got to dance two swing dance songs in August 2011. The next day, the doctor said, “No more swing dancing, etc, until we find out what is wrong with your back.” After I got out of the boot and cast, while my foot was getting back to normal, my lower back started to hurt. My back was hurting for a few months prior to the two songs that I got to dance to that night. So the adventure continued. Then before I knew it, I had mysterious pain all over my body, my skin hurt, my muscles hurt, my sides hurt, I had deep aches all over. I was then tested for many things. I have had MRIs on my lower back, hips, upper back, head, cat scans on my pelvis. You name it and I was tested for it. I had skin biopsies done, x-rays, and blood work done. I was tested for MS, Lupus, and many more. It is now Feb 2015 and after seeing over 20 plus doctors and medical staff….still no one knows what is wrong with me. I have seen chiropractors, back doctors, foot doctors, hip doctor, endocrinologists, rheumatologist,  eurologists, physical therapists, massage therapists, GI doctor, an internal medicine doctor, etc. The list of doctors is never ending. I have tried stretching exercises, injections, strict diets, to name a few, and nothing has taken away the pain. I have typed up all of the testing that I have had done and the results. I also have typed up many pages of the unique symptoms that I have and the chronic pain. I have given these typed up notes to each doctor that I have seen. Some of them read my notes, some do not. I have seen good doctors and not so good doctors. Each appointment I never know how it will go. I have had medical staff say different things such as “Something is wrong!” or “I lay in bed trying to think what is wrong with you, and it just baffles me.” or  “In 20 years I have never had someone be in so much pain after a stretching exercise.” or “If you are in chronic pain for over 2 years there is nothing to really do about it.”

However, when I feel anxious, overwhelmed, sad, fearful, I lay my requests in God’s hands before and after the appointments and each time God gives me a peace and a joy, letting me know He has it all under control. The exciting thing is that when I pray, God tells me consistently that there is purpose to the duration and confusion. There is purpose to all of it! God tells me that none of this is taking Him by surprise and He knows exactly what all is wrong with me. Although this has been life changing for me in all areas…I can honestly say I am truly grateful for what God is doing! I have learned what it means to cling to God and  to pour out my heart to Him. I have learned so much about God’s character throughout all of this! God has literally guided me step by step when the path has been dark and He continues to guide me. So 4 and a half years later, the mystery still continues. I am still actively seeking medical attention, in regards to finding out what is wrong with me. God says there is purpose to all of it! So I trust Him! This whole thing has grown my faith tremendously! God is teaching me to wait in Joyful Hope! Thank You God for everything that You are doing in regards to my health! I can see You actively working in my life! I am so thankful! Although I would have never asked for this adventure, I do thank You for it! Thank You for wowing me each step of the way and never leaving my side!
Habakkuk 3:17-19

Thursday Stories

This week’s brave story is from a young mom I had the privilege of getting to know through MOPs. Her story is incredible. She is being brave in the face of uncertainties and nont-normal-ness and she is rocking it. I hope you are inspired by her story!

Stories from San Antonio

When have I had to be brave? Well I’m not sure if I can call it being brave, scared, or just thrown into a situation that I had absolutely no control over. You might call it bravery, but I call it my life.
When I was in my second trimester with my daughter, I found out that she had what’s called a two-vessel umbilical cord. This means that she only had one artery and one vein, as opposed to two arteries and two veins found in a healthy umbilical cord. My OB doctor told me there was nothing to worry about, but after my mom did some research on it and found out that there’s a chance my baby could have heart or kidney problems, I asked to see a specialist.
That first appointment with the specialist did not go as well as I could have hoped. The doctor found out she had a Ventricular Septal Defect (VSD), which meant that the ventricle wall had a hole in it, which also means poor circulation. The size of this hole would determine if she was going to need surgery or not when she was born. At this appointment, I also agreed to an amniocentesis because if anything else was wrong I just wanted to know. Knowing was good because that gave me time before baby was born to prepare my mind and my heart. Thankfully my daughter did not have any chromosomal abnormalities. All was well except her poor little heart.
For the rest of my pregnancy, I had ultrasounds at every appointment, as well as an echocardiogram to make sure my little angel was okay and to monitor the progress of her heart, whether that was good or bad. We suspected that she had a second defect, but could never get a good enough view because her sweet little arms always covered her heart. We were hoping that she was just going to surprise us with no more defects when she was born, and that it was her way of keeping it a surprise!
Lydia Sharee’ Hancock was born January 29, 2013, four weeks early at 4 lbs., 10 oz. I saw her for five minutes before they whisked her away to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) to do another echocardiogram so that they could check her heart again. Finding out if your newborn’s circulation is healthy is not something you wait to do. It turned out Lydia had VSD as well as coarctation of the aorta. The Mayo Clinic defines this as “a narrowing of the aorta, the large blood vessel that branches off your heart and delivers oxygen-rich blood to your body.” We found out soon afterwards that Lydia had a severe case. She was given an IV and later a PICC line that delivered a constant dose of prostin to keep an extra valve in her heart open that otherwise closes soon after birth. This valve is used in utero to deliver oxygen to the rest of the body while the lungs are not in use.
We decided about two weeks later that Lydia needed heart surgery sooner rather than later. Long story short, she had open heart surgery with bypass on February 19, 2013. They had to reopen her chest as soon as they got to the PICU after surgery because the edema was so severe. She went into cardiac arrest three days later, had CPR and an AED used on her for over 30 minutes with no oxygen to her brain. She was on ECMO (bypass) for three days because she went into heart, lung and kidney failure, had her chest open for 8 days, had numerous drainage tubes sticking out of her chest, and she had to have peritoneal dialysis.

This mamma was a mess! That was the hardest thing I have ever had, and I think I will ever have, to go through.

I have a hard time calling it bravery because it was a situation that was out of control. I was right in the middle of it, and couldn’t do anything but stand by as nurses and doctors worked tirelessly around the clock to save my baby’s life. I remember asking them, “Is she okay? Will she get better?” and the nurses would look at me with the most sad look in their eyes and just say, “Your daughter is very sick.” That’s it. I’m tearing up now just thinking about it. I was 19 years old and had just been through what most moms don’t even know that other moms go through. Who knew??
Looking back, I know it was the grace of God that got me through those hard times. Right now, almost two years later I am still performing daily acts of bravery. Lydia is lovely, and she is doing the best she has ever been, but she still has so many things going on right now: brain damage, severe developmental delay, hydrocephalus with a VP shunt, epilepsy, tracheotomy, ventilator, gtube, reflux, ketogenic diet, up to 6+ meds twice a day, nurses at my house almost around the clock to help me take care of her, occupational, physical and speech therapy, case managers, monthly medical supply orders–the list is endless! I am constantly seeking out God’s help.

I have my ups and downs. Sometimes I get by just fine and really enjoy my daughter. Other times, I really struggle and just don’t want to deal with it.

I know people like to say that, “God only gives you what you can handle.” I have to say that after being Lydia’s mom I know that God definitely gives you things that you CANNOT handle. He wants you to lean on Him so that He can handle them for you! Psalm 138:3 says, “In the day when I cried out, You answered me, and made me bold with strength in my soul,” Another verse: “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” (2 Cor. 12:9).

I’m not really sure how else to end this because this journey is still ongoing for me, and it is a daily struggle. But all I know is that studying my Bible, praying, growing closer to Him, and spending time with my daughter has helped me work through this. Lydia has taught me more than I ever could have imagined, and she still teaches me daily.

Here are some verses that really speak to me in my situation. Really pay attention to what they say when you read them:

Lamentations 3:22-24 New International Version (NIV)
22 Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
24 I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

Zephaniah 3:17 New Living Translation (NLT)
17 For the Lord your God is living among you.
He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
With his love, he will calm all your fears.[a]
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.”

1 Peter 5:6-7 New Living Translation (NLT)
6 So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. 7 Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

Jeremiah 29:11 New Living Translation (NLT)
11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

Thursday Stories

Today’s brave story is from a fellow blogger named Sera. Her blog, Prone to Wander, Lord, I Feel It is a joy to read. Head on over there and check out some of her amazing posts!

Stories from the Interwebs

For as long as I can remember, I have always been afraid of someone I love dying. I think it started as a fear of no longer being able to see someone and has since become no longer seeing them because they died. My first memory of this fear planting a seed was when I was in grade school. My parents were a little late to pick us up from school one afternoon and as my sisters and I sat waiting for them, I saw a plane fly overhead. All of a sudden, I started silently crying because this bizarre thought popped into my head that my parents were on that flight and I would never see them again. It wasn’t true; my parents came shortly after the plane flew away. I was young. It was an irrational thought.

Nevertheless, even though it was irrational, it has stuck with me throughout my life. While growing up, I feared losing my parents, my siblings, my cousins, my friends, my future children, and my husband. Before my husband and I got married, while we were still dating, I remember some nights when I would wake up in the middle of the night in sweats, panicking, and frantically texting him to make sure he was still alive. In the first few months of our marriage, there were times when I would be hesitant to let him go to work or to the grocery store because I was certain he would die from a freak car accident or a school shooting (he worked at a college). I would lay awake at night, consumed by my fears and in tears while he held me, comforted me, and spoke Truth back into my heart and mind.

Things changed in September 2014 when my fear came true.

My husband Matt and I found out we were pregnant on our wedding anniversary and after the initial shock of “we’re going to be parents?!”, we were thrilled and became instantly head-over-heels in love with our baby who we found out was about the size of a poppy seed. We downloaded several apps to help us keep track of our Little One’s growth and every night, as we got ready for bed, we thanked God for the gift of life and prayed that our baby’s body was growing and developing the way the apps said they should. We planned, started picking out names, and learned as much as we could about pregnancy.

Our worlds came crashing down when we went in for our first ultrasound. As we sat in the waiting room, I knew something was desperately wrong. There should not be that much bleeding this early (or ever) in a pregnancy. My husband and I sat in silence in the waiting room, holding back tears amidst the handful of joyful couples smiling and talking quietly amongst themselves. When our names were finally called, we went to the examination room and they found no heartbeat. Our baby had died two weeks previously.

Matt and I have never felt such crushing pain as we did from finding out we had lost our child. Not only did our baby die, our hopes and dreams for a future with our baby also died. (As I reflect now, I’m discovering that a miscarriage is a strange thing. Before we had our miscarriage, we knew of maybe two people who had had miscarriages. After we told our miscarriage story to the public, we received dozens of messages and emails from people telling us “we’ve been where you’ve been.”)

My heart has always been ministered to through songs and the weeks following our miscarriage, one of the ways I grieved was through songs. I searched out and listened to both Christian and secular songs that had any reference to a miscarriage. I found songs with lyrics that spoke my heart and I played them on repeat until I found the next song that reflected where I stood in my grief.

I remember the first time I realized how my fear of losing a loved one to death had come true with the death of our baby. It was a few days after the ultrasound and I immediately became more afraid, then angry, then devastated. And the fear gripped my heart even more. The days following the miscarriage, I was terrified of leaving Matt’s side. In my warped, exhausted, grieving state of mind, I was convinced that since God let our baby die, there was nothing stopping Him from letting my husband die, also. God was surely against me in that way. I was sure of it. Why else would He take our baby from us? I didn’t want to, but I lived with this extreme fear and twisted mindset for three months after the miscarriage. Every night, in my despair, I prayed that the fear would leave me and that I would not let it reign over my mind.

One day in mid-December, I was sitting at work and streaming Pandora on my phone. A song came on that I did not recognize but a few lyrics caught my attention: For You are for us, You are not against… You make me brave. I looked up the song lyrics and relistened to the song as I read the lyrics. As I listened and read, things started making sense in my brain.

“…King of Heaven, in humility, I bow as Your love, in wave after wave crashes over me, crashes over me. For You are for us, You are not against us – Champion of Heaven You made a way for all to enter in. I have heard You calling my name. I have heard the song of love that You sing. So I will let You draw me out beyond the shore into Your grace.
You make me brave, You call me out beyond the shore into the waves.
You make me brave, no fear can hinder now the promises You made.
You make me brave, no fear can hinder now the Love that made a way.”

As I listened to the song on repeat, revelations were being made to me, things I had never really thought of before. God was for me, He was not out to get me. I was so afraid after the miscarriage that I was sure one of God’s goals was to make me as miserable as possible. This song reiterated things I had heard but had not really taken to heart. God is for me. God is on my side.

As I read and heard those lyrics, a flood of other Truths and Promises came flowing back into my heart and mind: I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ (Romans 8.17); Nothing is able to separate me from God and His love for me (Romans 8.38-39); God was right there with me through all of it – the miscarriage, the grief, the fear (Deut. 31.8); God will be with us in our future, whatever that holds.

Daily, I’m in the process of retraining my brain and my heart to be brave and not to be afraid – of the big things and the little things. Some days it’s more of a battle than others, but my battle cry (which sometimes is boldly proclaimed and other times whispered in despair) has become “He is for me, He is not against me” and “He makes me brave.”

Sera

Thursday Stories

Welcome back to Thursday Stories! This week, we are hearing from a dear friend of mine, Haley. In the time I’ve known her, I have seen God move in powerful ways in her life. She is unashamed of her vulnerability and is always ready to point to Christ as her source of strength, which she seems to have more of in her little finger than I have in my whole body. I hope you  are inspired by Haley’s story!

Stories from San Antonio

When Aly asked me to do this I was really excited, but at that moment–AND since–I have been really scared! I am NOT brave. Thoughts of inadequacy, “I’m just a normal, ordinary girl who has MS, what do I have to say?” Satan is trying to defeat me through all of these thoughts, but I’m not going to let him. It’s a constant battle, right? Here’s some of my story:

In 2000, I drove with my parents to the neurologist because I was having some eye problems. They told me it might be multiple sclerosis. I was 20, and the eye didn’t seem like a big deal. I remember my parents crying and my thinking that it wasn’t a big deal and didn’t really affect me, so I was okay with it. I was so naïve.

I had intravenous steroids and was back in my regular life routine in a few days. Not a big deal.

Jarrod (my wonderful husband) and I dated in college, and he knew that I might have MS. We graduated from college and got engaged, and he started medical school and I started teaching first grade. We got married and lived in Augusta, GA. We had no idea, but such fun and EASY times! Jarrod and I would meet at the gym after work (it was across from our apartment) and then run home. We were very involved in our church. I was the children’s assistant at our church and told the Bible stories, and planned a lot of the curriculum. It was fun, and I loved it!

In 2006, we had our first “trial” where our trust and dependence on God was put to the test. Jarrod and I were set to move to Cleveland, OH, and begin his residency at the Cleveland Clinic. I was very excited about snow. (I’m a southerner and had NO idea!) The Air Force paid for my husband’s medical school, and they needed his time first, so we stayed in Georgia for a year. I questioned God A LOT during that time. My husband is such a hard worker! I wondered, how could a good God hold him back from continuing his dreams? Now I look back and see God’s plan unfolding all along. I had 20 weeks of a healthy pregnancy in Georgia, and we got to  celebrate with my family and friends. That extra year for my hubby and me was a good year for our marriage, our jobs, and especially for our relationship and dependence on God.

We moved to Cleveland, OH, at the end of June 2007. My husband kept his residency position at a great hospital. I was 22 weeks pregnant, and on July 3, 2007, our lives changed forever.

My left side (mostly my leg) started to give out, and I went to my new obstetrician that day. I could tell from his conversation (that he didnt think I could hear) with the other docs that it was bad. My in-laws,  who live in Ohio, were wonderful and took me to the hospital. They confirmed I had had a BIG MS relapse, so therapy started and I worked on strengthening my left leg again. I ended up with a limp on my left side and a healthy baby boy. The MS specialist told my husband and me that it was very rare for a relapse to happen in pregnancy, and usually people with MS had children and were healthy. Around Grayson’s birthday I started getting antsy for more children, and so my husband and I tried again and, surprise! We found out at seven weeks that we were having twins. Surprised is not even adequate enough to describe our reactions. Twins? My body didn’t handle having one baby well. How would i handle two? Was God sure? I delivered two healthy babies on August 25, 2010–a precious boy and girl.  However, my body did not do well. My left side started to weaken and did not recover. I went from walking with a limp to a cane, then a walker, and now I’m mostly in a wheelchair. I ride an electric scooter around the block while my kids ride their bikes. I grocery shop early every Saturday morning so my husband can watch the kids, and it won’t be so busy to get through the store with an electric scooter. I’m not an organized person, BUT by necessity I’ve become one. I have several appointments each week–doctor appointments, therapies, Bible study–and our children are seven and four, so they have several things each week, too. Every day takes SO MUCH planning and dependence on other people. It’s HARD.

Our lives are SO different than we ever would’ve imagined! However, my family has learned more about the faithfulness and love of God than we ever would have imagined!

One of my absolute heroes in the faith is Joni Earkeson Tada, and I find a lot of encouragement in her writings. This quote was from her very first book after an accident left her a paraplegic: “There are two joys. One is having God answer all your prayers, the other is not receiving the answer to all your prayers. I believe this is because I have found that God knows my needs infinitely better than I know them. And He is utterly dependable no matter which direction our circumstances take us.”

To those words from one of my heroes, I can only add, ditto. Glory to God!

The Teeth

My daughter is growing some teeth. It’s painful but we’ve done this before. We can handle this. She has 5 lovely teeth already filling in the front of her mouth. The ones in the back couldn’t be too different, right? Wrong. Nothing could have prepared me for this. Right now, there are at least 4 teeth coming in all at the same time. The crying is almost too much for me to bear. Last night, she woke up 4 or 5 times. We tried all the usual methods of soothing her: cold blueberries, a damp cold cloth, massage her gums, extra cuddles.  But nothing made a difference. She just wanted to be held. So my hubby rocked her, we gave her some Tylenol, and she eventually fell asleep on his chest.

I wish she didn’t have to go through this. Growing pains suck–for her and for me. I hate seeing her in so much pain and being able to do relatively nothing about it. I know it’s something she has to go through. She can’t eat soft, mushy foods forever just like she couldn’t nurse forever. This is just something she has to endure. It’s a part of the process of growing up, and I hate it. I can hold her, comfort her, give her medicine to feel better but the process is still one she needs to go through, and I can not change that, no matter how badly I want to.

This whole process brought a couple passages of Scripture to mind. I’ve been rolling them over in mind since last night.

Hebrew 5:11-14
11 We have much to say about this, but it is hard to make it clear to you because you no longer try to understand. 12 In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! 13 Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. 14 But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.

In the previous verses, Paul (Probably. Not everyone agrees who wrote Hebrews) tells the Hebrews about the high priests being called by God and being submissive to God. He talks about Jesus being obedient to God and being the source of eternal salvation. Then he stops himself. He tells them that even though there’s a lot more to say on the subject, they have refused to mature and therefore wouldn’t understand what he’s saying. They insisted on living on milk rather than solid food. They’re not mature enough to grasp any more of the concept Paul (probably) is getting at. We know from 1 Peter 2:1-3 that milk is good for a while but it’s purpose, according to verse 2, is to grow up in salvation.

1 Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. 2 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, 3 now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.

Mother’s milk is good for a lot of things. It has the perfect balance of nutrients for babies; it protects baby against loads of illnesses; it prevents things like breast cancer in mom. But then babies become children. They get teeth, and their digestive system is fully operational. Eventually, kids need regular food. They have to stop nursing and eat solid food at some point. Paul wants the Hebrews to stop living on milk (a.k.a elementary truths of God’s word) and move onto the solid food!

So, what does this have to do with my sweet little daughter who is in terrible pain? Furthermore, what does this have to do with Madagascar?

Well, first, it gives me comfort that this teething pain is a good thing in the long run. It will give her the ability to eat solid foods! She’s already eating a lot of solid food, but it has to be small or mushy. Soon, she’ll be able to ground up food in her very own mouth! This is a GOOD THING.

Second, it doesn’t really have anything to do with my trip to Madagascar except for the fact that I feel like I’m sometimes still in the milk phase rather than the solid-foods stage of my walk with the Lord. How can I possibly do great things for God when I have to be reminded of elementary truths? God is big, that’s how. He can use me whether I think I’m ready or not!

I have an announcement. Plans for Madagascar have changed. I still need roughly $4,850 in order to go. Thank you to those who donated to my Indiegogo Fund. However, it was not nearly enough. Domoina and I have been praying and talking about this for quite a while. Because the money hasn’t come in yet, we both feel like God is telling us, “not now.” That’s not a “no,” it’s a “not now.” The plan now is to go in the summer of 2016, you know, unless the Lord changes our plan again!

Ends of the earth, here I come!

The Phone

My daughter accidentally dropped my phone in HEB on Thursday. And when I say “accidentally dropped,” what I mean is, “threw it down the aisle because she was tired of playing with it.” Yeah. Life with a toddler.

This was not the first accidental drop my phone has taken. When we first got these phones two years ago, I dropped my phone from my knee to the concrete while sitting outside, and it cracked the screen. My Otterbox arrived in the mail the next day. Then, about a week later, I was showing off my awesome new Otterbox and dropped my phone, and there went another crack off of the original one. These two cracks were all I had for a long time. Then one fateful day, my little baby became a toddler. She would play with my phone and then carefully lay it on the table when finished. When I say “carefully lay it on the table,” what I mean is, “throw it onto the ground with as much force as a 16 month old can muster.” Yeah. Toddlers.

Well, after my two cracks and a few months of toddlerdom, my phone finally bit the dust in the school supply aisle of my local HEB. The screen turned all sorts of beautiful colors, and the ringtone was a delightful out-of-tune version of what it used to be. Needless to say, the touch screen no longer worked, and by lunch time, the beautiful colors were just black and the phone was ready for the dump. Since it was time for an upgrade anyway (It was time for an upgrade last month but we were debating whether to stay with our current carrier or switch. #firstworldproblems), we decided to go ahead and get a new one instead of doing the insurance thing.

Now I have to wait FOUR DAYS for my new phone to arrive in the mail. FOUR DAYS! Can you believe that? Four days without Facebook, Instagram, and Gmail in the palm of my hand. Four days of not listening to Adventures in Odyssey through the tape thingamajig in my car. Four days of not being able to text or make a phone call or play Angry Birds! How would I drive anywhere without GPS? How would I let the world know how awesome my sandwich was at lunch? How would I capture adorable moments of my daughter playing in a mere 10,000 photos?

In the midst of all my frustration and impatience, I recalled some unease my missions pastor had about my trip to Madagascar. He was pretty concerned with how I would transition from the one of the richest countries in the world to one of the poorest, especially since I’ve never been outside the US. I confidently informed him that although I’m not accustomed to things like outhouses and public wells and things of the sort, I would certainly find the strength within me to deal with these sorts of things. Of course I’d be able to adjust, even if it was a little bit difficult. It’s not like I’m one of those spoiled American brats who buys new clothes just because, or has multiple cars, or goes out to eat whenever the mood strikes, or is dependent on a phone for daily tasks.

Oh, wait.

Upon realizing that I was most certainly a spoiled American brat, I decided to turn to Scripture for help. The Bible says a lot about wealth. Basically, the love of money is the root of all evil. But not all Scripture says that money is a terrible, terrible thing, which surprised me. In fact, Solomon talks about wealth very fondly in Ecclesiastes. And Paul is just as content with prosperity as he is with being poor.

Ecclesiastes 7

¹¹ Wisdom along with an inheritance is good
And an advantage to those who see the sun.
¹² For wisdom is protection just as money is protection,
But the advantage of knowledge is that wisdom preserves the lives of its possessors.
¹³ Consider the work of God,
For who is able to straighten what He has bent?
¹⁴ In the day of prosperity be happy,
But in the day of adversity consider—
God has made the one as well as the other
So that man will not discover anything that will be after him.

Solomon is the richest, wisest guy ever and he says that money and wisdom are both very good things. He calls them both protection, which interestingly enough, is the Hebrew word tsel which means “shadow, shade.” The same word was used 53 times in the Old Testament. Sometimes, it meant literally the shade of a tree or rooftop like in Jonah. The tree that the Lord provided and then took away shaded Jonah as he sat outside Ninevah after the people turned from their wicked ways. Other times, the word meant something closer to refuge as in Psalm 57. David took refuge in the Lord, in the shadow of His wings. He was on the run from Saul, living in caves, and trusting in the Lord for protection.

In Ecclesiastes 7, Solomon is calling money a refuge. A place to sit and rest without the heat of the sun beating down. With money, I am comfortable. I can have a phone and buy clothes when I feel like it and go out to eat when the mood strikes. Money protects me from starvation and from weather. It protects me from discomfort or even sickness. Money is most certainly a protection.

Wisdom is also called protection but there’s a major difference between the two. Wisdom protects and preserves the lives of its possessors where money only protects. Wisdom offes security beyond basic needs of survival like food and shelter. Wisdom revives and restores. Wisdom refreshes.

Solomon explains that God made prosperity as well as adversity in order to show man that there is nothing that will be after him. Money is good but it’s just money. Wisdom is good but adversity still visits the wise. And no one can change that. God allows for both for His glory. Can anyone undo what God has done? Can anyone alter what God has set in motion? No, not one! So whether I’m in America with a phone and other wonderful modern conveniences or in Madagascar without any of those things, God has made them both and it is possible to be content in both. My contentment should not be from conveniences but rather from the Lord. Check out Paul’s words to the church at Philippi.

Philippians 4

¹⁰ But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly, that now at last you have revived your concern for me; indeed, you were concerned before, but you lacked opportunity. ¹¹ Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. ¹² I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. ¹³ I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. 

Living humbly and living in prosperity is no different when my strength comes from the Lord. So, I will be without a phone for four days. Oh well. I will learn to be content. I suppose traveling to Madagascar will probably be a rougher transition than I originally imagined, but the Lord created the situation in the United States just as He created the situation in Madagascar.

Ends of the earth, here I come!